Dirty Little Secret
by Cykotyks
Summary: [OneShot] [SongFic] [Crack!Fic] It's their dirty little secret... [ShuuRen, ShuuRenKira]


**Disclaimer**: I claim no ownership. Bleach belongs to Kubo Tite. The song "Dirty Little Secret" belongs to the All-American Rejects.  
**Warning**: Mentions of sex...  
**Note**: In case it's not clear - the first third is Shuuhei's POV, middle is Renji's, last is both (you'll see).  
**Pairings**: ShuuheiRenji, ShuuheiRenjiKira (OMG...)  
**Rating**: T (for "wTf")  
**Word Count**: Not even 800 XD  
**Other Notes**: This is basically because I was stuck for inspiration, so I decided to write a really stupid songfic with a pairing I haven't messed with too much yet. This is what came out of that. The ending is really a "WTF" on my part. So, yeah, I'm posting this for you guys before I have to skitter off to work. Ja!

* * *

Dirty Little Secret

* * *

He's a loud, obnoxious little idiot. 

_Let me know that I've done wrong,_

I'm his "prestigious" student-teacher.

_When I've know this all along._

He comes by my room and asks for help with his work and I have to keep going over and over it for him.

_I go around a time or two,_

He knows what I'm trying to "teach" him, he's just acting stupid to piss me off.

_Just to waste my time with you._

He's somehow managed to get close enough to where I don't mind that he stays around and bugs me.

_Tell me all that you've thrown away._

I tell him he's an idiot. He tells me I'm annoying. Neither one of us budge, though, and the tension pisses both of us off.

_Find out games you don't wanna play._

We both seem to go for the first move at the same time and our mouths collide. We fight for dominance until I pull back and remind him who the one in charge here is. He smirks and gives in. The textbook falls to the floor as he lays back and I start undressing him…

_You are…the only one that needs to know…_

As much of a brat as I keep calling him, he learns quick, and he's surprisingly good in bed – top _and_ bottom.

_I'll keep you my dirty little secret (dirty little secret)._

He's also smarter than he acts. We're both willing to keep our mouths shut and he acts like the confused student around me in public.

_Don't tell any one or you'll be just another regret (just another regret)_

After all, he's only a freshman, and I'm the most promising graduate of my year.

_(Hope that you can keep this) my dirty little secret – who has to know?_

* * *

He's really not as serious as he looks. 

_When we live such fragile lives,_

He smiles and laughs and he can be cute and sexy and dorky, but only around me.

_It's the best way we survive._

I make him go over things I already know just so I can see him get irritated.

_I go around a time or two, just to waste my time with you._

I bug him in the halls, too, for the same thing. And just to be around him.

_Tell me all that you've thrown away._

He tries to get back at me, though, when we're alone in his room.

_Find out games you don't wanna play._

He decides to work on my bakudo skills, but his plan backfires when I bind his arms before he can bind mine. He knows what I'm thinking, of course – that's why we practice this when we're sitting on his bed.

_You are…the only one that needs to know…_

He rolls onto his back and draws his knees up and apart, and he smirks at me. I lean over and rub myself against him. He moans and growls at me to get it over with before he attempts to top me without the use of his hands…

_I'll keep you my dirty little secret (dirty little secret)._

I know why I'm not good at kidou. Every time he tries to teach me, we end up like this. We don't say that, of course. We just say I suck at kidou.

_Don't tell any one or you'll be just another regret (just another regret)_

After all, it would make him look bad if he people thought he wasn't a good teacher – because he's a _really_ good teacher.

_(Hope that you can keep this) my dirty little secret – who has to know?_

* * *

Between all the hot, steamy, sex-filled nights… 

_The way she feels inside (inside),_

And the stolen moments throughout the day…

_Those thoughts I can't deny (deny),_

We find ourselves thinking of each other, and we force ourselves to be silent, unresponsive.

_These sleeping thoughts won't lie (won't lie),_

We're not stupid – reputations are at stake.

_And all I've tried to hide – it's eating me apart, trace this life out._

But we can't help it. We find excuses to be around each other, to touch each other.

_I'll keep you my dirty little secret (dirty little secret)._

Everything's innocent around everybody else, though.

_Don't tell any one or you'll be just another regret (just another regret)._

We're just friends.

_I'll keep you my dirty little secret (dirty little secret)._

We're just a student and a tutor.

_Don't tell any one or you'll be just another regret (just another regret)_

So when Kira catches us kissing…

_(Hope that you can keep this) my dirty little secret (dirty little secret) (dirty little secret)_

What else can we do…

_Who has to know?_

But have him join our study group?

_Who has to know?_

* * *

**---------------------------------------------**

* * *

Shoot me._  
_


End file.
